When The War Is Over
by Rhiannon-Bridget
Summary: Commander Shepard destroyed the Reapers and saved the Galaxy from anhiliation. Doesn't she deserve a break? Not when an old adversary returns. Nor when a new threat rises, once again calling for the Spectre Hero of the Alliance. Rated for adult themes
1. Reinstatement

CHAPTER ONE: REINSTATEMENT

Closing my eyes I breathed deeply and inhaled the briney scent of the ocean air. I wriggled my toes, burying my feet deeper into the wet sand and hissed as the cold, foamy breakers curled around my ankles. Slowly I opened my eyes and marvelled at the golden orange, yellow sky as the sun crested slowly above the horizon, beginning a new trek across the sky. I gave a slight start as warm arms slid slowly and silently around my waist. I placed my hands atop strong, well muscled arms as he pressed his chest to my back.

I felt his soft, tender, warm lips press lightly to my neck and closed my eyes, enjoying the fluttering feeling in my tummy which felt akin to a swarm of butterflies dancing inside me to a tempo which I couldn't hear. It still amazed me that after all this time and after all we had been through that he could still stir those kinds of feelings in me, I had to admit that I had thought those feelings might fade after time but they did not, if anything they had grown stronger after having time grow.

"Did you jump a little?" He asked, smiling against my neck. I clicked my tongue.

"Hardley. I don't jump at anything. I took on a fleet of Reapers and saved the Galaxy from anhiliation. I am... I WAS Commander Shepard." I corrected myself. Sometimes it was hard to remember that I was no longer the N7 Commander but that I was a civilian.

"You will ALWAYS be Commander Shepard to me." Kaiden said turning me to face him. I smiled sweetly.

"I certainly hope not," I said while faking a pout. "It would certainly make some of our exploits together very uncomfortable." I teased. Kaiden grinned evilly.

"Reg's never stopped us before... COMMANDER," he dragged the word 'Commander' out. I opened my mouth to reply but Kaiden cut me off with a kiss. It was slow and sensual and awakened something in the pit of my stomach. I slowly laced my arms around his neck and thread my fingers through his dark brown hair. I felt the rumble in Kaiden's chest and knew I was arousing the same feelings in him. He took hold of my hips and pulled me flush against him. I moaned deep in my throat as Kaiden lowered us down to the warming sand.

He was lying on top of me, running his hands down my sides lightly. Kaiden trailed his lips along my collar bone and I could feel him pulling down my bikini strap. I felt the wind pick up and gazed up at the sky as a shadow passed over us. Kaiden must have noticed the shadow too, as he pulled away and looked up at the sky too.

As the drop ship passed over us I propped myself on my elbows. "It's N7." I said and Kaiden's expression hardened.

"Well we both know they aren't here for me." He snapped as he stood. "I am not the N7 member here." He held his hand out to me and I took it, allowing him to help me stand. I fixed my bikini and allowed Kaiden to take my hand and walk with me up the wooden steps that led to the small beachside cabin that Kaiden and I were staying.

"In case it slipped your notice I am not N7 anymore either." I said. Kaiden glared at me.

"I hardly think they are here for me."

"Hmm..." Was all I had to say to that. We reached the cabin and met Anderson at the door. He was in Formal Alliance gear and had an old friend with him. I smiled.

"Anderson, it's good to see you." I said with a light laugh, then I turned to the other man. "You too, Vega."

"You still look smokin' Lola." Vega drawled back. I blushed, realizing my state of near undress. I felt Kaiden tense beside me and I squeezed his hand in an attempt to settle him.

"Still intent on calling me Lola, huh?" I asked and Vega grinned evilly.

"I told you, you look like a Lola."

"Uh huh."

"To what do we owe the pleasure?" Kaiden cut in, addressing Anderson.

"May we come in?" Anderson asked. I realised I had been rude by not offering them to come inside and I felt sheepish. I opened the door and ushered the men inside.

"Would you please excuse me while I go and put on something more appropriate?" I asked and Anderson nodded while James raised his eyebrow and eyed me over.

"You don't need to dress on my account Lola." He said. I could sense Kaiden getting more and more angry and I glared at James.

"I will just be a moment." I said and I went into the bedroom and threw on a shirt and a pair of shorts. It would only be fitting that the two N7 men would come and find me on a remote island with my boyfriend and minimal clothing. Kaiden and I had come here particularly to be alone and as far from any and all kinds of civilisation. Kaiden and I hadn't brought much in the way of clothing, as we didn't go out much.

I entered the living room to find all three men sitting on different chairs, not speaking. I shook my head and took the empty space on the loveseat next to Kaiden. I took his hand and turned my attention to Anderson.

"You're looking well." I mused. Anderson smiled and looked at Kaiden and my entwined hands.

"I could say the same for you Shepard. I guess civilian life is treating you well."

"It's great." I said with a grin as Kaiden squeezed my hand. "It's quiet and less stressful."

Anderson chuckled. "I bet." He bit his lip and grew uncomfortable. I had a feeling I shouldn't ask the question that I had in my mind but I asked it anyway. I knew I wouldn't like the answer.

"What's on you mind Anderson?" I asked. He looked to James then back to me.

"The Alliance needs you Shepard." He began and I felt my stomach drop up to my throat. "We have leads on stray memebers of Cerberus." My eyes hardened.

"I took out Cerberus." I snapped, anger making me see red.

"We know. You did take out the Cerberus base and the Illusive man also, our intelligence suggests that there were others that worked under the Illusive man that have set up new Cerberus bases."

"I'm retired Anderson, or has everyone forgotten that?" I asked them.

"You know as well as I do Shepard that you may be retired but you are never out." Anderson said and I sighed. "You're the best and you know it. No one can do what you can, Shepard."

"I'm in." I said. "Am I picking my own team?" I asked. I could feel the anger emanating off Kaiden but I chose to ignore it. Anderson smiled.

"You're team has already been assembled and are awaiting you on your ship."

"My ship?" I asked.

"Your one and only." James replied.

"The Normandy." I breathed and Anderson smiled.

"The Normandy and it's crew are waiting for you." Anderson said as he stood up from his seat. Kaiden, James and I also stood. Anderson Saluted me and I returned the gesture. "Commander Shepard, consider yourself recalled to active duty."

"Aye aye Sir." I replied.

Kaiden stood in the doorway, arms folded, saying nothing, simply watching me as I packed a bag. Finally I couldn't take anymore of his silent analysis of me so I stopped packing and turned to face him. "What's the matter Kaiden?" I asked.

"I thought you said you were done? That after the Reaper war you wanted to retire, that you didn't want to fight anymore." He demanded angrily. I sighed and went to him. I took his chin in in between my thumb and pointer finger and gently kissed him.

"I'm sorry Kaiden but Anderson is right. I need to do this. I am the only one who knows how the Illusive man worked and how Cerberus can operate. I need to be the one to bring them down. They need me and this is my unfinished business."

Kaiden's gaze softened and he kissed me back. "I love you Emma, you know that don't you?" He asked softly and I smiled, placing my forehead to his.

"I know, I love you too Kaiden."

"You know I will be on this mission with you? I refuse to let you out of my sight for a minute." Kaiden said as he pulled me in close to him. I chuckled and wrapped my arms around him.

"I wouldn't have it any other way, Major Alenko."

"There was something I wanted to do while we were here Emma, but we have run out of time and I want it done before you return to the N7 program." This was news to me, I didn't expect there to be an ulterior motive for this holiday and I simply lifted an eyebrow.

"I see."

"Emma Shepard, will you marry me?" Kaiden knelt to the ground and offered me a ring. I grinned and kissed him.

"Of coarse I will." I replied and this time when Kaiden kissed me I allowed him to lay me on the bed and forgot about everything except the man I loved for a long time.


	2. Reunion

CHAPTER TWO: REUNION

Walking along the corridor of the space port I couldn't help smiling to myself at the familiarity of it all. The Alliance outfit, the solodiers standing at attention but most of all the amazing vessal that was my space ship, The Normandy. As I neared the metal doors they opened automatically, making a sound that sounded like a faint 'Whoosh'. It had only been eight months since the Reaper attack and I had overcome them, saving the Galaxy and gave my notice of retirement, yet I realised I had missed the ship, her crew and most importantly, her pilot.

As I stepped out of the decontamination airlock I heard a familiar voice and was pleasantly suprised to discover I was excited to see him. I never stopped to think about how much I enjoyed his company, I supposed sometimes a person needed time away from those around her to appreciate how much they meant.

"Joker." I exclaimed as I entered the cockpit. The pilot's chair slowly spun around and there he sat, smiling up at me.

"Commander." He replied. Joker grabbed the back of his chair and shakily stood and saluted me. I returned the salute and dropped my hand.

"At ease." I told him. Joker dropped his hand and I went to him, gently placing my hand on his arm and guiding him into his seat.

"I heard about you and Kaiden... ah I mean Major Alenko." He corrected himself. I sighed.

"I bet you did. I think he's told any and every one who'll stand still long enough to listen to him."

"He really is head over heels for you isn't he, Commander?" Joker asked and I nodded.

"I think so." I replied with a wink and Joker grinned.

"I have no idea why?" He teased and I folded my arms over my chest and pasted on an angry face.

"Well not all of us have weird fantasies about dating robots." I challenged. Joker's face grew hard.

"Not all of us can have 'Normal' relationships without breaking every bone in our body." He replied.

"I know, I'm sorry." I whispered and Joker smiled.

"It's alright. If I were able to have a real relationship and I didn't worry about Reg's then I would probably have chased you down myself." Joker said. I gave a small sound of suprise at that.

"You would? I didn't think you saw me as anything other than your superior?"

"I know." Joker turned back to his controls and I was sure it was to hide his embarrassment. "You ARE beautiful Commander, more than that you are strong, brave, honourable AND you saved my life, in more ways than one. Things like that tend to get a guy into you." He admitted.

I had nothing to say to that so I decided to quit while I was ahead. I patted his shoulder and excused myself. I walked down the hall of the ship and stepped down the two steps into the open deck of the ship. A huge orange depiction of the Normandy hovered above the flight control table that occupied the center of the room. I walked around the table and headed to Traynor to ask her which room everyone was in and what leads we had on Cerberus but was interrupted by Anderson.

"Shepard." He said as he came to me. I shook his hand.

"Anderson." I replied. "I am assuming you have some leads for me?" I asked hopefully and he nodded.

"Yes, follow me." He motioned to the double doors that lead to the war and tactics room. I followed him and remained quiet as Anderson lead the way. Once inside the room he turned to me. "It's not going to be easy." He began and I sighed. Nothing ever was. "All we know for sure at the moment is the whereabouts of one Cerberus scientist. We don't know if he still works for Cerberus but we do know that he was responsible for a lot of the experiements that went on during the Reaper war."

"Where is he?" I asked.

"He is located on a small outpost on a remote Planet in the Avaris system."

"Avaris?" I asked, wracking my brain for the system. "Never heard of it." I confessed. Anderson nodded.

"Nor have many of us. I assumed that was why Cerberus chose it. The system is rarely known by any species in the Galaxy, even less is it visited."

"Yeah," I breathed, looking down at the table, noticing that my hands had clenched into fists. "That sure sounds like Cerberus M.O"

"Before you get all excited and charge off guns blazing at Cerberus it may be wise to visit the Citadel and check on your Spectre status. I think it may come in handy while you're out there." Anderson advised. I agreed completely. A few minutes later Anderson was gone and Joker was guiding the Normandy out of Alliance space and was making his trek to the mass relay. I was stunned to see the relay was working normally.

One of the side effects of me blowing up the Reapers was that all the Mass Relay's in the known galaxy had been blown to hell. The VI that appeared to me in the shape of the young boy that had died on Earth at the start of the Reaper war, had said that all our technology would be lost and we would be thrown back into an electronic 'Dark Age' so to speak.

I snorted to myself... Showed what he knew.

None of the technology had been lost, (don't ask me how it had survived) and even though the Mass Relays had blown up, the ancient VI or being (however you wanted to think of it) hadn't counted on the Quarians and Tourians putting their combined brain power into fixing the damn things.

Eight months on and ALL the relays were fully restored and operational. I had to hand it to them, those two species really were some of the best in the Galaxy, and I was honoured to be so close to two of the most outstanding of the two races. The door to my personal quarters opened and I stepped inside, massaging my neck. I had gotten complacent and had forgotten how much stress went into the job. Thankfully I had kept myself fit, it would be a much harder job otherwise.

"You look tense, Commander." Kaiden's voice cut through my thoughts. On auto pilot I reached for me gun, luckily it was in my ammo trunk on the left wall.

"Kaiden? What are you doing in here?" I demanded, feeling both annoyed and flattered. He was reclining on the bed with his arms folded behind his head. I felt that familiar fluttering in stomach but squashed it down. I had other things to do right at this moment. It didn't slip my notice that he hadn't answered my question and I asked him again.

"Kaiden? Is there something I can do for you?" I asked, stepping into the main living and bed area of my personal quaters. I went to the small desk and reached for a datapad. I felt Kaiden come to stand behind me. He grabbed the datapad and turned me to face him.

"You look tired already." He guided started to unbuckle my belt but I stopped him.

"I can't, not right now." I said. "Is that why you came?" I asked and Kaiden's features turned hard.

"No. I came here because I promised I would keep my eye on you. I want to spend each night here with you. I thought you'd like that."

"I do. I just have so much on my mind."

Kaiden growled and turned to walk away then made a hard turn and pointed at the ground. "You're doing it again!" He snapped and I frowned.

"What? What am I doing?"

"You're working too hard. I admire it, really I do and I know it's important to you to keep check on us all but I can't sit here and let you work yourself into the ground again!"

"Kaiden..." I said with a sigh but he threw his hand up and shook his head.

"NO! Don't Kaiden me. I can't do it. I can't lose you. Not again. I thought you died on the Citadel when Sovereign crashed into it, I watched you go down with the original Normandy, watched you walk away with damn Cerberus on Horizon, had to wait while you took on the Collectors and see if you'd come back to me then there was the Reaper attack on Earth where I had to watch you nearly dead, fighting for you life every day for months, not knowing whether you would pull through.

"I love you, Emma, more than life itself and I will not, CAN NOT live my life without you." He ran a hand through his black hair and I dropped my gaze to the ground. He was right, he had me at a dead end and I had nothing to say. Kaiden turned back to me and gently cupped my chin.

"I need you Emma. I want to marry you, have children with you and damn it to hell, I want to lead a civilian life with you."

"We had a civilian life Kaiden." I answered. "It drove me mad. I don't handle sitting cosy on Earth doing nothing while there are enemies out there." I pointed out the window at the tiny silver orbs that blinked in the night. "Cerberus is my loose end."

"You swore to me." Kaiden cried. "You promised after the Reapers you were done."

"I need to do this. I promise, after this there will not be any more. I'll quit." Kaiden snorted. "I will."

"You say that, but that's what you said last time."

"I will. If it's what you want..." I trailed off.

"It is what I want." He kissed me. "We'll buy a Vineyard and start a wine B&B."

I smiled. "Sure."

"Good. Now..." Kaiden reached for my belt buckle again. This time I did not stop him.


	3. Returned

CHAPTER 3: RETURNED

I slowly returned to conciousness, relieved to be away from the dark place in my dreams that I seemed to find myself visiting each night. I saw the boy every night, and every night I tried desperately to save him, pull him from the fires of the Reaper lasers that had consumed him and tragically ended his young life. I slowly opened my eyes and stared out the window at the twinkling sliver orbs. I enjoyed the heavy, yet comforting weight of Kaidens arm drapped across my waist. The heat on my back from his chest pressed to me and his arm under my head, soothed me. I thought I had put the past behind me and that I had moved on, I guess I was wrong.

"Can't sleep?" Kaiden's deep voice rumbled behind me. His voice was slow and slurred from sleep and I'd be damned if I didn't think it was the sexiest sound in the universe. I sat up and threw my legs over the bed. I ran my hands through my blonde hair and over my cheeks. "What is it?" Kaiden asked, sitting up and becoming more alert.

I stared at a spot on the floor and took my time in answering. "It's the boy."

"The boy?" Kaiden asked he slid closer to me. "The one on Earth?"

"Yes." I replied. "I thought I was past that. I guess I was wrong." I admitted. I glanced over my shoulder to see his reaction. Kaiden was staring at me.

"Don't feel guilty. You did everything you could. Both on Earth then across the Galaxy during the war. Hell you saved more lives than most did. You united species that had been at war for centuries. No one can do what you did. You should be damned proud of yourself. I know I am sure proud to call you mine."

I stood and grabbed a towel. I needed a shower to wash away the dregs of the night. "Emma?" Kaiden pressed. I glanced over my shoulder.

"I know Kaiden. I don't blame myself. I just hated the whole damned Reaper war."

"We all did, Emma." I knew he was speaking the truth but it still seemed to me that nobody could be as angry as I. I had told ALL the species of the galaxy that they were coming. I had warned the Council yet they had done nothing until it was too late.

I turned on the shower and stepped in, letting the too hot water burn away the dreams and horrors I was forced to relive all the time. I wondered, briefly, if I would ever stop dreaming about the boy whose name I never knew.

Once I was convinced the nightmare had been washed away from me I turned the shower off, dried myself off and pulled on my official Alliance military suit. Looking in the mirror I sighed, feeling more like my normal self. The automated doors opened and I walked out of the bathroom. Kaiden was sitting on the end of the bed, elbows resting on his knees, hands clasped together, with his head down. As I retrieved a datapad from the table beside the computer he lifted his head to stare at me.

I smiled at him and motioned to the door. "I have to speak to Joker, coming down to breakfast?" I asked. Kaiden didn't respond for a moment. Finally he shook his head.

"I'll be done after my shower." I nodded once and left the room. I took the elevator down a floor to the Comabt Information Center. Once the elevator door opened I walked to the cockpit to talk to Joker. When I got there Joker was already chatting to EDI.

"You know they were just a bunch of Hypercrites before the Reapers showed up right?" Joker said. I lifted a perfectly arched eyebrow. There was no doubt in my mind who Joker was talking about. EDI confirmed what I already knew.

"The Council had no official proof that the Reapers existed, let alone that they were any kind of threat to the general population. One of the limiting flaws of organic life is that they do not asses the logical and numeral directives for official proof that threats exist. Therefore..."

"Yeah, ok we get it." Joker cut in. "The Council wouldn't believe in the Reapers until Harbinger came knocking on the Citadels front doors."

I had heard enough. "We almost there?" I asked. Joker gave a start and turned immediately professional.

"Ah, yes Ma'am. We should be docking in a few minutes." I nodded and folded my arms, standing behind Joker. He glanced at me and remained quiet. It seemed my subtle message was enough for him. I was not leaving and that chatter about the Council was terminated. Two minutes later the gigantual monolinth that was the Citadel rose up out of the shadows. It was awe-inspiring. It was amazing. And it was powerful.

The comm crackled to life and the voice of the Alliance Docking Officer came online. "This is Alliance Control Tower please confirm ship Identification?"

"This is the SSV Normandy," Joker replied. "Commander Shepard requests permission to dock."

"Request confirmed Normandy." There was a pause and the young woman continued. "Was there a specific location you would require a shuttle to Commander?"

"I need to get to the Council Embassies." I replied. Sometimes I hated the Council.

"We shall have a shuttle waiting for you, Commander."

Joker looked up at me as I turned and headed for the airlock. "Give 'em hell Commander." He said. I looked over my shoulder.

"For old times sake?" I asked and he nodded once.

"You bet."

* * *

I stretched my arms above my head and yawned. I felt my shoulders pop and dropped my arms. It amazed me how much talking to the Council drained me. It was like I was constantly dancing around in circles around those three. I had to admit that with the new human Council member things were going a lot better. I had hated Udina from the first moment I had laid eyes on him. Even for a politician he was a very disconcerting man. There was simply something I didn't trust, turned out I was bang on the money. At least one good thing came from my meeting with the Council. My Spectre status was back in tact.

I had some time before I had to leave so I headed down the Presidium. I was hungry and even though the food on the Normandy wasn't as bad as some ships I had served on in my time it still wasn't the best. I went to the main plaza and up to the cafe that I knew sold human meals. It helped that it was owned by a human. I grabbed the menu and sat at a table.

There were all kinds of dishes from all over the Galaxy. There were basic human meals such as Steak and Fries. Pizza and Enchaladas, and then there were bizzare alien dishes that were wide and varied. Things that included foreign seafood, seaweed and some Krogan meal I didn't want to even guess at what went into it. I was about to order when a shadow fell over me. I would know that scent anywhere and smiled without looking up from the menu.

"Want to join me Major?" I asked without so much as glancing up. Kaiden sat down at the table beside me and reached for his own menu.

"It's nice that we can sit and enjoy the view and a meal." He mused. I glanced up at him but he was engrossed in the menu (at least he was pretending to be). I decided what I wanted and placed the datapad back on the table. I was silently thoughtful, looking out at the Presidium. It amazed me that after everything the Citadel had been through, after all that I had done to it (blowing up a Reaper in it, using it as a giant weapon conductor), it remained unchanged for the most part.

I caught Kaiden watching me and turned to him. "What?"

"Did you hear what I said?" He asked quietly.

"You mean about how its nice to eat?" I asked. "Yes I heard you." Kaiden sighed and looked at all the people bustling around the Presidium.

"I said it seems that we don't seem to have any time for each other anymore."

"What are you talking about? You see me more than anyone else on the Normandy." I retorted. "You spend all night every night with me."

"Yes and you are either reading data intel from Anderson and Hackett or sleeping." He took my hand. "I need you Emma. I worry about you. I want you to promise me that you'll take an hour for yourself every day."

"I will." I assured him. It was at the precise moment the waiter came and took our orders. Kaiden and I chatted and laughed while we waited for the food to arrive and I admitted, sadly, that Kaiden was right. I barely stopped to make time for him anymore. I decided I would rectify that immediately. I would make sure I had at least an hour each day to be with him, just us. I hoped it would be enough.


End file.
